Katcha - My Views

The secrets of life are only hidden to those who refuse to see.

Sometimes, in the course of our lives , we realize we have done this before. We may not be sure when, or what happened, but we know we have lived before. I have heard many different theories on past lives, and no two are ever exactly alike. If my oppinion is different from yours, my appologies, but it is what I believe.

My personal belief is that not everyone has lived before or will live again. Only a chosen few have that honor. Some may be mortals born of mortals who develop exceptional powers over the course of a life time, but most are created by far greater forces. Even then, how many times you return depends on your purpose. Once you've served your purpose on Earth, then you go on to your next destination. True mortal men usually only live once, and return as ghosts or spirits, if at all, but there are always exceptions.

Contrary to what one may believe, you really do not have any control over your destiny. There are always forces working on steering you towards one path or another. Sometimes you might do something that throws their plans off for a while, but they always get their way. We are all part of a game they play. Some were created for the sole purpose of this game, while others were merely born into it.

Many times these forces would have us believe we are lesser than we are or that we are limited, but this is not always true. Sometimes we merely have to use the key to unlock the door in our minds and walk through, but be wary. There may be a reason why things have been hidden from us. If we are not truely ready for what lies inside, then to walk through may do us more harm than good. You must be the judge of when you are ready, not anyone or anything else. Some may be looking out for your best interest while others are looking out for theirs. You never truely know which is which for they all either seem to be for you or against all. Look inside. If you don't know if you're ready, then you probably are not.

I have lived several times before, though most of my past is still hidden from me. I have not yet walked through that door, though I have been tempted to several times. I am not yet ready, or maybe I am and I'm just not brave enough to. Either way, I will wait a while longer to unlock the door and step through. I know when I do that many mysteries will unfold and many questions will be answered, but for now I will wait. I still have an underlying fear that somehow when I go through that door all light will leave me and I will be engulfed by darkness. A sign that I am not ready.

September 9, 2006 Update:

Doorways, doorways, doorways. It seems you go through one and several more appear. Is there no end to it all? Yes, I have finally ventured through that doorway only to find a hundred more. Each one darker than the previous. Darkness? Funny, that no longer seems to bother me. The mysteries and questions are still there, probably more than I started with. And the darkness I so feared before seems to energize me and make me stronger. Strong enought to open the next door in the never ending hallway. Does that make me evil? Am I some dark being? Questions, questions, questions. Maybe some day I will finally get some answers.

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